The Story We Tell

Have you ever been in a social situation where you feel as if you are standing outside of yourself observing the conversation you are having?  As you observe you may have your hand on your chin, gently shaking your head back and forth with a bit of a disappointed smirk on your face...this story, again?

As a child growing up with two brothers I quickly learned that if I could make fun of myself first then I won - they had nothing on me.  This early entry into self deprecating humor was a brilliant survival tactic at the time, however it wasn't until much later I saw it as a habit that had the potential to limit me.

I knew I was passionate about the students I worked with right away.  I knew that I desired nothing more in the profession than to really make a positive impact on the student.  Certainly my efforts weren't always the most effective and many times I reacted to the situation, but I knew the intent that was in my heart.  Looking back I really see the truth in the statement 'children (people) won't remember what you said...they'll remember how you made them feel.'  I have come to recognize the power of the energy within us that comes from the truth we hold.  When we believe in the intrinsic dignity and worth of a human being, no matter whether it be failure or success in how the message is delivered...the energy will stay the course - the feeling is there.  Life seems to have a way of getting your attention when the outside doesn't match the inside...it might be called internal or external chaos.  At least that was true in my case.

I say this because I often wasn't taken seriously in my professional efforts.  It hurt me inside because I knew how passionate I truly was.  However, I was the one that constantly reinforced this self deprecating 'story' that I was (this is a bit dramatic) a 'joke'.  People will treat us the way we present ourselves.  I suppose this contradicts what I said earlier about 'others will feel the energy of the truth within you' regardless of what you present.  I will clarify that a bit by saying others will feel that energy when mindful and present with you in the moment.  We (choose) to live in such a fast paced surface of a world that we become this brain research of mimickry.   My thought is that if we don't intentionally practice present moment awareness than others will quickly receive their interaction with us based on how we present ourself in that moment.

If we have not taken the opportunity to consider the story we tell and the language we use to tell it, then we may be living a life that is created by us and then reinforced by others based on our own false or unexamined perception. We create their perception (?)

Where am I and how did I get this far off the original topic?

The fourth lesson in the I Am curriculum is High energy v. Low energy language.  Take a moment to consider the story you tell...does it add to your experience or take away?  I'm not sure there is any person who works with adolescents whom hasn't heard some version of 'I have a horrible life.'  What version do we tell with that same theme?  If we know the passion that lives within us, why don't we tell that story?  Practice creating a story of the life you desire by beginning with one or more of the following sentence starters:  I am...I have...I allow...I can.

I want to introduce a trio of acronyms that I created to help remind us to tap into our personal power. OWN the experience (allow what is without trying to control anything) in the NOW (allow yourself to have the experience of the present moment)...you WON - you are empowered to manage your life experience.  The acronyms are all the same letters that represent the words:  Observe, Witness, Notice.  Be in your experience.  As you pay attention to the inner experience it can increase your capacity to live your same life from a deeper space of being or knowing.  It can also be quite comical as you observe yourself and the 'story' you tell - ie. "OMG...seriously?...I am totally trying to impress this person right now...."

As we learn to allow the experience to be what it is and allow ourself to connect to that deeper space we tap into the creativity, inspiration, and possibilities that reside in that deeper space.  The following are the first and last verses from a popular poem, Our Deepest Fear:

'Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.'
 
'And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we're liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.'
 
As an adult might have told us while growing up:  You don't need to make anything up.  Just tell the truth.